What's So Funny About Unemployment?

A funny little unemployment blog for your (un) enjoyment

Happy Festivus! Time for The Airing of My Grievances!

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Happy Festivus for the Rest of Us! Yes, it’s December 23, the official day of every Seinfeld fan’s favorite fictional late-December holiday.

If you don’t know what Festivus is, allow this video to explain:

The Story of Festivus

I haven’t put up my aluminum pole because I’m going out-of-town for the holidays — but, like Mr. Costanza, I do find tinsel distracting. 😉

And this whole year has been a Feat of Strength for me. So my Festivus won’t be over until New Year’s.

However, even a patient person like me can celebrate the Airing of the Grievances. So, it’s time for you to listen up, because I’ve got a lot of problems with you people! And now you’re going to hear about them!

My first grievance is with whoever gave this computer a virus last month. Go get a real job and write a real computer program with your time, okay?

Second, I’m always finding ways to be grieved at MARVIN and the Unemployment Insurance Agency. Look, I know our state’s short of money. However, why does that mean you have to delay getting my money into my account? At least be honest and change the MARVIN recording which says you’ll receive your payment on the “next business day” to “two or three business days,” okay?

Third, I’m peeved at Mother Nature. Why does fresh snow have to be so pretty to look at, yet such a pain to drive on?

My fourth grievance — and I mentioned this in my last post but I’m still p.o.ed about it — goes to the Fox Network for taking the wonderful show “Glee” off its schedule until April. At least we Gleeks will have fall season videos by the end of the year, and two cast albums worth of music from the show.

Fifth goes to Nestle. I recently bought a package of its Christmas Shapes pre-cut sugar cookies and made them yesterday. An excellent product for the time-pressed baker: Two dozen Christmas cookies, already ready for you to bake and decorate with a package of icing. Except the icing comes in only one color: red.  Really, Nestle? I had no problem painting the stockings red, but red snowmen? And little red Christmas trees? Next time, how about white icing?

Last but not least, why did my stepmother have to have a birthday so close to Christmas? Because I forgot/was too busy baking cookies to call her and wish her a happy birthday yesterday. 😦

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